Hooooookkkkkkaaaaayyyyy?

So, as you may have gathered from the photo of Brett a few posts back, there was a non-bracelet event at this year's WSOP where the winner instead got a ridiculously large trophy.

This event, the media event, was also sans buy-in and anyone who made the final 9 were able to choose a charity and a donation would be made to that charity in their name. Both Court and I decided to play for the foundation established for Devin Porter' s dad. I had told Devin about the event and he kindly texted me to check on me shortly after we combined to the final 3 tables. Then, I kid you not, Devin hops in a cab from the Palms and I get myself a lil railbird.

Unfortunately, the event was designed to be over with in like 4 hours, so I very quickly found myself rather short stacked. Brett and I were put at the same table and he raised in early position when I was in the BB. I look down at 5-5 and very quickly ship it in. He looks frustrated and calls. Before he turns his hand over he asks, "do you have a pair?" I turn over my pocket fives and Brett laughs as he turns up---the other two fives. The board then runs out J-6-6-9-J and we are both playing the board to chop the pot.

A few hands later it folds around to me and I have A-Q, so I very quickly ship it for 9 big blinds or so. The dude from Bluff in the big blind beats me into the pot and I think I am in bad shape until he turns over his hand and shows me K-10.

K-10? Well, I am ahead, but not a huge favorite or anything and the guy manages to spike a gutshot straight on the river no more than ten minutes after Devin arrives. Apparently Devin has nothing better to do though, because he sticks around to cheer on Brett with us in addition to wish ill will on the K-10 guy (we even booed and hissed when he was introduced at the finaltable. Sore loser? That's me!)

Also on the sidelines watching the action is an hysterical Swedish man with a proclivity for punctuating his sentences by a long pause followed by a drawn out "hoooooookkkkaaaay?" He was also dressed like the most stereotypical tourist you'll ever encounter, complete with: fanny pack, socks with sandals, and an appalling print shirt of dogs playing poker. Don't believe me? See for yourself:

He was laying odds for the players at the final table and, when it was 3-handed, he offered 2-1 odds to Devin on Brett. Devin took him up on the bet and put down $5 on bertminatti taking it down. Well, when it is almost over and Brett has a HUGE chip lead, CrazySwede comes back to Devin and says he is about to win $10. Devin corrects him, "No, you mean $15."

CrazySwede then proceeds to explain to us that odds are very different in Sweden and 2-1 is equivalent to doubling your money. He and Devin debate the semantics of oddsmaking for a minute or two before Devin is finally like, "bet's off...give me back my money." Needless to say, CrazySwede was the life of the party and had everyone, including Nolan Dalla, rolling on the floor laughing.

In the end, Brett took it down and won a ridiculously large trophy, but I still maintain he should have thrown the event in order to get 2nd or 3rd, which also received trophies. The difference was that these trophies were open/challice-like objects, perfect for consuming copious amounts of alcohol out of while Brett's larger, ostensibly more prestigious trophy had a closed top and was essentially good for nothing.

In completely unrelated news, I randomly googled myself today and stumbled upon this. I can't quite figure out the context of the post, even when I read the posts preceding and following it in the thread. Nonetheless, I am going to just take it as some sort of compliment that I exist in the 2+2iverse. I have no idea who "clowntable" is on 2+2, nor any idea why he/she would have any clue who I am, but still, kinda bizarre.

Bertomo!

Pong and Circumstance

So Brett, being an Off Topic mainstay on P5s has a few friends in the poker community. Last night, we decided to meet up with them at what might be the strangest casino I have ever entered: O'Sheas.

This casino has a food court in it. And an area for beer pong tables. That is right, I said beer pong! We will be returning to that subject shortly, but first, let's discuss this food court.

So this was basically the saddest mall food court I had ever seen. Bright plastic, neon lights, and a bunch of non-chain skeezy restaurants with your token Subway nestled in the middle. Brett decided he wanted pizza. That is, until it arrived and looked a little something like this. I suggested to Brett and Wein that this pizza was likely featured in the 1987 teen film classic "Fast Times at Ridgemont High".

The fact that his pizza likely rivaled him in age only slightly deterred Brett from consuming it. As you can tell by his expression, it was decided that avoiding eye contact with the slice was the best option. Shortly after Brett gave up on this little culinary adventure, more P5s peeps began to filter in. Amit Makhija, Chris Vaughn, Dan Martin and others arrived and so began the distinctive degenrate behavior of a group of twenty-something year old poker players.

Which, of course, meant money was very quickly put on the line in a game of beer pong. In case you can't decipher the photo, there was $1k on the line in a Sean and Wretchy vs Brett and Chris Vaughn showdown. A ten cup pyramid to start with was agreed upon and the epic game of beer pong began.









Wretchy and Sean were off to a great start. Focused and undeterred, they were pinging, ponging, and pwning the competition.













Chris and Brett, on the other hand, were having some issues. Despite being a solid part of the Brett/Wein tandem in earlier games of pong, Brett...well, sorry to say this Brett....he totally choked. As you can see, Chris and Brett attempted to talk some strategy and even briefly considered employing the patented Amit jump fader style of beer pong tossing in an attempt to even the playing field.








Needless to say, Team Wretch/Sean proved victorious. More importantly than them winning though, please tell me you notice the uber-klassy teriyaki restaurant behind them. Post-game, Chris attempted to win back his losses on the craps table with little success, while Brett opted for his old standby, Texas Hold Em Bonus Poker, with even less success. With the night very quickly turning into the morning and several guys attempting to win back their losses, we all ended up at our home away from home: the poker table.





The guys, being the crazy degenerates that they are decided it wouldn't be fitting to actually play poker, but instead to go all-in blind before the flop and see who had the best hand. I want you to notice how many chips Brent Hanks has on the left. This is after he has won a couple of hands, not even how much he started out with. Now check Brent on the right here...see the mountain of $5 chips? When the day was done, it amounted to $2400. If only the WSOP could be so easy, no?